Lord, I Believe; Help My Unbelief

Jeff shared a lesson last week that just keeps swirling around in my mind. It's so amazing to me when someone brings a lesson that seems to be geared just for me.

He started in Matthew 13:53-58 talking about how Jesus didn't do many miracles in his hometown because of the people's unbelief. "So, is there a difference between saying you believe," he asked us, "and believing--every day, in every aspect of your life. Do we actively practice belief as a verb?"

He then continued on to visit the stories of Elisha and the widow (II Kings 4:1-7) and Naaman (II Kings 5:1-14). If you aren't familiar with these passages, take a few minutes to read them and you will be blessed. Jeff basically pointed out that the widow and Naaman had to ACT upon their belief in order for God to work in their lives and if we aren't living our lives like we *believe*, it might be possible that we are quenching the Spirit and preventing God's work in our lives.

This lesson came at just the right time for me in our adoption journey. I shared earlier that I've been plagued by fears of rejection and the cost involved, but hearing this lesson made me ask myself if I *believe* God. Sometimes I get caught up in myself and my pride--I have these little qualifiers about how we might not be chosen again and I'm not going around telling too many people we're hoping to adopt another child "just in case". . .just in case what, you ask? Well, let's face it, just in case it doesn't happen because then I would look like an idiot.

Risk looking like an idiot. . .you know, sort of like the poverty-stricken widow, faced with selling her sons into slavery to pay off her bills--but she went around to her neighbors asking to borrow empty jars. Imagine this with me for just a moment. She is broke and has only a little oil, but God (through Elisha) tells her to go borrow empty jars (not just a few!!!) and then pour her little bit of oil into all the jars. Talk about opening yourself up to look like an idiot. Can't you just see the people loaning her a jar, then watching through the window as she walks up to another house to borrow ANOTHER jar? "What does she think she's doing? What is she going to put in them? She doesn't *have* anything to put in them! She has really lost it now!!"

But God, our ever merciful and faithful God, multiplied that oil and she filled every single jar (don't you wonder if she wished she had gathered MORE jars?! would I have had the faith to gather LOTS of jars, or would I have just done 'the bare minimum' to get by?!) so she was able to pay off her debts and live off what was left.

And then there's Naaman--rich, powerful Naaman, suffering from leprosy, hypothetically willing to do whatever big and complicated thing Elisha asked in order to be healed. But wash seven times in the Jordan River? Ummmm. . .people are going to think I'm really strange--and besides, that river is DIRTY! The king of Israel certainly didn't believe--he was afraid Elisha's failure would bring war to his doorstep. But when Naaman humbled himself to believe and act upon that belief, God healed him.

So how are we living--as though we believe--really, really believe in every circumstance, and not as though 'we believed' at some point in the past? It reminds me of an analogy in the movie, "Facing the Giants". If two farmers pray for rain during a drought, and one goes out to plow his field, which one believes God is going to send rain? Yes, that's right--the one who risked looking like an idiot--the one who acted on his faith--the one who got ready for God's blessing.

God commanded the widow to borrow jars, He commanded Naaman to wash seven times in the Jordan River, and He has commanded me to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction and keep myself unspotted from the world (James 1:27). So, as I step out in faith to obey His directive, I borrow the prayer of the boy's father (Mark 9:17-24) and ask that the Lord increase my small faith and open my life for Him to work and shower blessings upon our family.