School's Out: Reflections

I really have nothing to say, but I just feel like sharing how happy I am to have completed this school year as we anticipate a fun summer.

Insert crazy happy dance, arms in the air, head thrown back in glee, spinning in circles, jumping up and down, and an echoing whooooooooooopppppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

It's rather ironic to consider that I would describe this past year as our most difficult year--well, MY most difficult year.  I had the hardest time staying on task, keeping a schedule, being motivated. . .well, simply ENJOYING homeschooling.  At the same time, it was an incredibly productive year for my teens--especially academically, but also in character and life experience.

Destry's violin recital with his teacher, John, accompanying

Next year I hope to reintroduce delight-directed learning, both for myself and for my kiddos.  I recently read that one way to determine subject areas for delight-directed learning is to consider what you are saying to your child when you're annoyed with what they're doing.  "Destry, how long are you going to play that piano/violin today?  You're supposed to be doing your math."  "Briana, it's time to put your quilt/embroidery away and do something else now."  I appreciate that prompt and look forward to seeing how we can better incorporate these skills into our school day next year.

Destry's youth symphony performance

Several years ago, when prompted to name our "school", I named it "Together to Love to Learn."  I felt like there were so many areas represented in that title which captured some of my goals in home education.

Destry and his friend, Jerrit, dissecting a cow eyeball in our study of biology

We are together--and I love that.  I have so little time with my children, only about eighteen years, and I am grateful (most days, ha) for the time homeschooling provides.

Locating the lens of the eyeball

We are together to love each other--and "relationships are what homeschooling is all about."

"Homeschooling is largely heart to heart. The method and even the curriculum do not matter nearly as much as the relationship between child and parent." -Ruth Beechick

Briana dissecting a pig with her friends Adalee and Briana

And one of my biggest goals (after their love and obedience to the Lord) is that my children would love to learn, both now and throughout their lives.  I want them to be lifelong learners, and I'm aware that my attitude will affect their attitude toward learning.

(I love this picture of lil sis peering over Briana's shoulder at the dissected pig!)

So this summer, as I add to their transcripts, write course descriptions, and prepare for next year, I hope to overhaul my perspective and be better prepared to enjoy next year.  Meanwhile, I'm still doing the happy dance.

Tom Sawyer

"You can tell he was a kid once--and he loved it."  

This is what Destry said about Mark Twain as I chuckled aloud one afternoon while reading The Adventures of Tom Sawyer for Carrie's May book club selection.

I think Destry perfectly summarized why this story is a classic.  I've read this book several times and each time, I escape through Twain's unmatchable ability to paint the life of a carefree, mischievous boy.  Who else but a young boy would consider himself rich with "an apple, a kite in good repair, a dead rat and string to swing it with, twelve marbles, part of a jews-harp, a piece of blue bottle-glass to look through, a spool cannon, a key that wouldn't unlock anything, a fragment of chalk, a glass stopper of a decanter, a tin soldier, a couple of tadpoles, six firecrackers, a kitten with only one eye, a brass doorknob, a dog collar--but no dog, the handle of a knife, four pieces of orange peel, and a dilapidated old window sash" (14).

Other examples of Twain perfectly capturing the unique energy that is a little boy:

• "Tom was over the fence and gone.  There was a gate, but as a general thing he was too crowded for time to make use of it" (18).

• "The next moment he was 'showing off' with all his might--cuffing boys, pulling hair, making faces--in a word, using every art that seemed likely to fascinate a girl and win her applause" (27).

• "he was the envy of every boy he met because the gap in his upper row of teeth enabled him to expectorate in a new and admirable way" (39).

• "There comes a time in every rightly-constructed boy's life when he has a raging desire to go somewhere and dig for hidden treasure. . . to buy a new drum, and a sure'nough sword, and a red necktie and a bull pup, and get married" (143).

I couldn't help but laugh as I enjoyed Twain's clever insight into young boys, and my enjoyment of the book had my teens vying for their turn to read the book again.  Even as I read the book from my current perspective as a parent and don't want my boys to experience his same adventures, I have to agree with Aunt Polly that Tom "warn't BAD, so to say--only mischEEvous.  Only just giddy, and harum-scarum, you know.  He warn't any more responsible than a colt.  HE never meant any harm, and he was the best-hearted boy that ever was" (92).

Twain's gift with words made me stop and savor his phrasing more than once.  I think my favorite word picture was this one:

"the old man laughed loud and joyously, shook up the details of his anatomy from head to foot, and ended by saying that such a laugh was money in a man's pocket, because it cut down the doctor's bill like everything" (174).

Even as Tom Sawyer provides lots of entertainment and laughs, Twain shares some more serious, adult themes within his story.  As I face challenges in raising my children and resisting ornery eyes or smart mouths, I echo Aunt Polly's "I've GOT to do some of my duty by him, or I'll be the ruination of the child" (4).

 I also got a kick out of Mark Twain's less-than-subtle observations on the nature of mankind.

• "He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it--namely, that in order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to attain.  If he had been a great and wise philosopher, like the writer of this book, he would now have comprehended that Work consists of whatever a body is OBLIGED to do, and that Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do" (15).

• "Often, the less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it" (32).

• "This funeral stopped the further growth of one thing--the petition to the governor for Injun Joe's pardon.  The petition had been largely signed; many tearful and eloquent meetings had been held, and a committee of sappy women been appointed to go in deep mourning and wail around the governor, and implore him to be a merciful ass and trample his duty under foot.  Injun Joe was believed to have killed five citizens of the village, but what of that?  If he had been Satan himself there would have been plenty of weaklings ready to scribble their names to a pardon-petition, and drip a tear on it from their permanently impaired and leaky water-works" (192).

I'm so grateful to the fellow book lover who recommended Tom Sawyer for our May book club selection.  As my Spring calendar collected more and more scribbles and I thought the last day of school would never arrive, I enjoyed a refreshing break in the form of  a good visit with this old friend.

Number Two

She's at it again.  Briana has the top of her second quilt completed.  I like this one even better than the first one she made.  This one is significantly larger and she's planning to cozy up with it on her bed this winter.  I love her color scheme and the pattern.

She has high hopes of finishing it in time to enter it for 4H in the fair the end of July.  Maybe it will make it to the state fair and y'all can come see it along with the Bill Riley talent show, butter cow, and other Iowa State Fair classic attractions.

And have I mentioned that I find it funny that one of the negatives some people fear in homeschooling is children not having opportunities to try different things and being just carbon copies of their parents?  Or that my sewing expertise ends with sewing on buttons?  I just love that she is developing this talent for which I have neither interest nor ability as she is discovering her gifts and dreams.

An Easy Standby

 Sometimes Kiana's hairstyles aren't all that fancy or time-intensive.  Right now Kiana is wearing five little braided ponytails that took less than 30 minutes to fix and decorate.  I just want to share this simple-but-cute style to encourage other mothers, particularly adoptive mothers, from getting overwhelmed or intimidated by hair.

 I divided her hair in half from ear to ear across the top of her scalp.  I then made a big 'V' part in the back half to form three sections.  Using ballies, I made uneven ponytails in these three sections (some high, some low, none centered or attempting to make a straight line--less stress for mama to make it perfect and it's cuter that way anyway) and braided them.  Then I parted the front half diagonally (to prevent stress on that center part which is so popular) and formed two more off-set ponytails and braided.

 This style has been in for one week so far.  I did take the ballies out real quick (although I left the hair braided) this morning and tightened the ponytails by just putting them right back in at the base of the hair as they were getting droopy.  It took just about five minutes and I expect this style to last another 4-5 days.  The new "big and sparkly" beads have been a huge hit with her and I think they are adorable.  It really might be a bad thing for me to live so close to a store that has Black haircare products and ornaments.  A-hem.

I just had to include this picture because I love it--she's such a cutie with that smile!

Godly Young Man

I love watching the Lord provide.  I've been praying for the Lord's help in my relationship with my 14-year-old son.  In many ways, it's easier being the mother of a teen daughter than son because our common interests make it easier to relate to my daughter. We also spend a lot of time working together, and we have read many books together about being a godly young woman. 

I find reading books with my children to be a relationship-building experience as it opens the door to communicate about those difficult-to-broach topics, but I have a hard time finding appropriate books for these discussions with my son.  So I was specifically praying to find a book that I could read and discuss with my son that would promote growth both in our relationship and in his relationship with the Lord.

Shortly after this request, I received a package in the mail.  Crossway books sent me the book Disciplines of a Godly Young Man written by R. Kent Hughes and Carey Hughes for me to review.  I knew immediately I would like it--it was, after all, an answer to prayer.

Now that I've read it through (and have read and discussed the first four chapters so far with my son) I can share specifically what I like about it.

• The format:  The book is written in short chapters which makes it less intimidating to read.  Each chapter addresses a different discipline and is packed full of relevant points and illustrations.
• The tone:  The authors are a father/son duo and this tone works very nicely.  They don't talk down to the reader, nor are they overly buddy-buddy with the reader.  They communicate with both a fatherly tone of spiritual maturity and a more youthful, in-the-trenches commiseration.  They are honest and relevant, both with the content and the tone.
• Scriptural support:  They dissect several Scriptures which make for an interesting and insightful study.  They don't just use a verse here and there to support a point they want to make; rather, they focus on passages of Scripture and pull several points out of the Scripture.  One example is in the discipline of perseverance in which they overview Hebrews 11 and then, from chapter 12 verses 1-2, expound on the themes 1) Strip down, 2) Run, 3) Focus and 4) Consider.
• Needful:  Our young men need books like this.  It is well-rounded in the topics it covers and includes something for everyone.  The authors are not afraid to set the standard high--right up there with God's standard.  Being a godly young man is not something that just happens.  We parents must be intentional in teaching them what godliness is, and this book is a wonderful tool toward that end.  Our young men must also be intentional in striving toward godliness.  This book fills a void in the genre as I have been looking for sometime for a book of this quality.  (I am open to other recommendations if you know of any, by the way.)

My son is diligent in reading the Bible daily, but sometimes it's an intellectual exercise without the application.  Adding a reading of Disciplines of a Godly Young Man will, I hope, encourage him to think more deeply about the Word and to examine himself in light of what God's Word says.  So far he is really getting a lot out of it and we have enjoyed meaningful discussions of the questions at the end of each chapter.

If you have a teen-aged young man in your life, I highly recommend this book.  (There was only one very minor point I disagreed with, namely that of a young man's "work, be it ever so humble, is a divine calling" (114).  I crossed out calling and wrote in commandment as I don't see scriptural support for specific jobs being a "calling", but rather God has commanded man to work from as early as the keeping of the Garden.)  I love the authors' theme:

Train yourself for godliness; for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every other way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.  The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance.  I Timothy 4:7-9

Tell Me What You Want

What do you want?  What do you really, really want--so badly you would do almost anything to have it?  So badly you think about it all the time?

A precious little baby to love?

Oswald Chambers said

"My goal is God Himself, not joy nor peace, nor even blessing,

but Himself, my God."

I have been thinking about this quote a lot lately.  What do I really want?  Do I want what God gives me, the many blessings He pours out upon me?  Or do I want God, Himself?

A partner to share your life with?

Can I honestly say: 

"Though the fig tree should not blossom, and there be no fruit on the vines, Though the yield of the olive should fail, and the fields produce no food, Though the flock should be cut off from the fold, and there be no cattle in the stalls, Yet I will exult in the Lord, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation."  Habakkuk 3:17-18).

Financial security?

If God truly has first place in my heart and life, then my desire for Him will be greater than my desire for anything else.  Moreover, I will be satisfied even if He is all I have.

Friends to talk and share with?

Do we experience this same desire for God Himself, not just what He can do for us? 

Do I really want God MORE THAN I WANT. . .

You fill in the blank for yourself.  What do you want?

Made Us Think of You

I received an email from a friend in Missouri today.  Two of their cats have recently had litters of kittens and one of the kittens got lost from its litter and the mother wouldn't take it back, so the other mama "adopted" it.  My friend said it's pretty special to look in the basket and see them, mama nursing kittens who look just like her right alongside a kitten who looks much different.. 

"The children say it is like your family--with children that are different colors."

I loved it!  It was the sweetest email and made me miss these dear friends.  They are the same friends who, as they were expecting another baby (biologically), one of their little ones asked if the new baby would be white or "chocolate like Shonya's baby".  It just seemed perfectly natural to this little guy and he just wondered what his new little brother or sister would look like.

It's such a blessing to have friends and family who are supportive of our family even as it looks a little different than you might expect.  If you are considering adoption, start talking about it now with the people you are closest to so you have a chance to prepare them and you can benefit from their acceptance and support, both through your journey of bringing children home and throughout all your lives.

Leadership and Crisis

I have thirty-six little flags sticking out the sides of the book from my recent reading of  Leadership and Crisis by Bobby Jindal, former congressman and governor of Louisiana (with his writers, of course).  I thoroughly enjoyed this book which highlighted Jindal's experience as a son of Indian immigrants and his conversion from Hinduism to Catholicism and focused primarily on summarizing his political views.  When I closed the book, I told my husband I wish I could vote for him this November if he really believes and would implement what he says in the book.

I guess many people expect Jindal to someday run for president, but I'm afraid he's too conservative to appeal to enough voters to get elected.  I appreciate his view toward smaller government and his common sense approach to liberty, economics, education, and healthcare.

My favorite quote:

"The biggest threat to our freedom comes from within our borders, not beyond them.  It comes when we are tempted to bargain away, little by little, the liberties other Americans have fought and died to place in our hands" (158).

On the government's role in the economy:

In my view, the government's role should be ensuring a robust marketplace that is competitive (so consumers have choice), transparent (so consumers can make informed decisions), accountable (so resources are leveraged to reward good clinical outcomes rather than simply paying for the process of care), effective (by engaging consumers in making good health choices for themselves and their families), and accessible (so healthcare is affordable).  Moreover, the system has to be based on sound, proven economic principles--the government simply cannot suspend the law of supply and demand" (189).


Today we have the federal government in Washington trying to run car companies, banks, and our entire health care system--rather than sticking to its core job of protecting America from all enemies foreign and domestic, protecting the life, liberty, and property of the American people.  What we really need is for the federal government to do those things it should be doing with excellence, and stop trying to take over pieces of the private sector that it has no business in and no reasonable chance of running well (4).

The book was very easy to read and sometimes his voice conveyed just a touch of sarcasm, which I have to admit made me smile.

Examples of his humor that made me smile:

When Congress meets, a lot of bad things happen.  Astronomical amounts of money get spent; the government takes over banks and car companies; people try to re-engineer entire sectors of the economy.  Elected officials inevitably feel the need to do something, and they crave the media coverage that accompanies big proposals, no matter how wasteful or destructive.  As Mark Twain observed, 'No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session. . .Why not pay members of Congress to stay out of Washington?  For decades we have paid farmers not to grow crops.  We should pay congressmen a decent salary and then deduct money for every day Congress meets in session" (102).

"I would go so far as to say that a society that does not defend the defenseless and consider all human life to be both sacred and precious is really not a civilized society, at least not in my book.  And this is after all. . .my book" (216).

I think this book is well-worth reading and would recommend it whether you are politically-minded or not terribly concerned with politics; whether you are conservative or not; whether you have ever considered what freedoms you are preserving for your children and grandchildren or not.  It will make you think and it just might challenge your stance on several issues.  While he spends considerable time criticizing current policies and practices, he also shares some solutions including a "Seven Step Recovery Program".

I most appreciated his reminder that our leadership reflects who we are as a nation and the need for us to retain (or recover!) the christian principles upon which this country was founded.  If we as individuals are not hard working, moral, self-governing people, what can we really expect of our government and nation at large?

"Our republic rests on self-government.  That requires people to share a common commitment to virtue, to mutual respect, to core values, to doing unto others as you would have them do unto you, to selflessness, and to 'peace, patience, kindness, and self-control'" (268).

What defines us (Americans) are our values and ideals, our commitments to individualism, a spirit of independence, limited government, and the American spirit. . .Our political system has worked brilliantly for more than two centuries because it could rely on a culture in which people share a common commitment to doing the right thing.  As John Adams warned, 'Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people.'  Without that, even a democracy could simply become the will of the mob" (271).

Wordless Wednesday: Ornery

Comfort Food

You're welcome.
Because you're going to want to thank me for sharing.

This is how you make Heather's Scrumptious Chicken and Taters.

First you bread boneless skinless dark chicken meat with flour, salt and pepper.  (okay, okay, I'll confess I added some rosemary because in my world rosemary makes everything better)

Then you brown the chicken in oil or butter or maybe even a mixture of the two.

Meanwhile, heat some oil and saute a couple cloves of garlic in another skillet, then add sliced potatoes.  Red potatoes are best with the skin just washed and left on.  Sprinkle some oregano over the potatoes and just a hint of red pepper flakes.

By now your chicken should be browned and you can add about a cup of white cooking wine and some chicken broth and simmer the chicken while the potatoes finish cooking.

Once the potatoes are fried, dump them into a 9X13 pan and cover them with the chicken and all its yummy juiciness.  Top with some frozen peas and bake at 375 degrees for 30 minutes.

This meal is quick and easy and super delicious.  It's that down-home, comfort food, party-in-your mouth kind of goodness.  I don't know what makes it so good, but I can't wait to make it again.  It cracks me up because it looks like a bunch of plate-scrapings for the hog bucket, but we were scraping the edges of the pan rootin' for the last few bites.

 For dessert, may I suggest individualized banana splits?

 Briana went all out with crushed pineapple, strawberries, chocolate syrup, caramel syrup, Cool Whip and chopped nuts.

 Kiana followed big sister's lead--and ate every last drop.

 Easton opted for ice cream and chocolate syrup and that's all thanks.

 Tyrell was quite proud of his sundae made up of ice cream and strawberries. . .

and Dad of course had a little of everything.  Destry must have eaten his before I got a picture and everyone was too busy eating to get a picture of mine.  All seven of us enjoyed our special treats for about the same price as one banana split at the ice cream shop!

Girls' Getaway

I was so excited a few weeks ago to attend Beth Moore's Living Proof Live conference in Kansas City, with my sister, Shayla, and my sister-in-law, Marcy.

I have completed several of Beth's Bible study guides and previously attended two of her conferences, so I was well-acquainted with her passion for and knowledge of the Lord.  I don't always agree with everything she says, but her studies have nurtured my hungering and thirsting for the Word and challenged me in my growth.   I recently finished her guide for the book of James which was one of my favorites (right up there with Believing God, Living Beyond Yourself, A Woman's Heart, Breaking Free. . .hey!  It's in my top five anyway! chuckle).  I thought it was fun to see Beth's growth throughout this study as her theology was challenged by James' emphasis on "if you don't live it, you don't believe it" and that made me even more excited to go and be a part of this conference.

 

Something you should know about Beth, if you don't already, is that when you have completed a few of her studies (let alone heard her speak in person), you feel like you know her.  I know about her husband, children, dogs, and grandkids.  I know some of the major trials of her life, including her childhood abuse and her pain in parenting a little boy for several years before he returned to live with his birthmother.  Most of all, I know her love for the Word of God, her incredible sense of humor, her gift for teaching, and her transparency.  Marcy is just as bad as I am--we had fun joking around about our friends Beth and Travis.

An auditorium filled with 9,800 women gathered to study the Bible all lifting their voices to sing praises to God is an amazing thing.  I literally had goosebumps as we finished one song in three-part harmony a capella in that huge convention center.  I really enjoyed the study of I Thessalonians chapters 1 and 2, as I referenced earlier, and was especially pleased that they used this opportunity and gathering of women who professed to love God to extend an appeal for us blessed Americans to sponsor starving children in third world countries through Compassion International.  Before the appeal, I have to admit to feeling somewhat sick to my stomach as I looked around at the thousands of people and started calculating how much money had been spent for all of us to be there.  Ticket, motel rooms, gas, eating out. . .maybe even a splurge for a new outfit.  Times 9,800 women.  While children are starving, homeless, many parentless.  My respect for the Living Proof Live team deepened when they encouraged the women to share some of our bountiful blessings.

I had only two complaints about the weekend.  I was frustrated and disappointed when she led a prayer at the end of the convention and asked everyone to join her in committing their lives to Christ.  When she was finished, she said that several people had likely just been saved.  It's so sad to me that such a student of the Word can persist in believing (and perpetuating) this practice, when it's simply not what the Bible teaches.  I have searched and searched and can find no Scriptural example of just saying a prayer and thus accessing the blood of Christ to cover our sin.  On the day of Pentecost it doesn't say Peter led 3,000 people in a prayer and they were saved, nor do any of the other apostles throughout the book of Acts counsel the people they were teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ to "accept Jesus into your heart, repeat after me and you will be saved".  I don't know a lot about David Platt, although I was inspired by his book Radical, but I admire his courage in standing up for the lack of Scriptural justification for this "superstition" in this video.  Should it not concern us?!

My other complaint about the weekend was that it was simply too short.  We ran down Friday afternoon, had the conference Friday evening and Saturday, then came straight home.  We ate some outstanding food and I enjoyed meaningful conversation in the vehicle there and back with some of my favorite people, but I really could have used one more day.  I guess that's a silly complaint, though.  :)

Raising Adults

Notes from A Mom Just Like You by Vicki Farris

"The most important principle I would share with you is this:  our ultimate goal is not to raise children, but to raise adults.  We want to eventually bring our children to the point where they set their own standards, make their own decisions, and take responsibility for their own lives" (230).

FOUR WAYS TO EQUIP OUR CHILDREN FOR ADULTHOOD (pp 232-238)
1) Maintain a balance between rights and responsibilities.

• remain proportional to one another
• both should increase as the child matures
• train children in general principles, then give them the responsibility to carry out those principles for themselves

2) Let your children know at an early age what you expect of them and be as consistent as possible

3) Have reasons for your rules and tell your children what those reasons are

• your ultimate goal is to equip them for adulthood so you need to tell them not only what the correct decisions are, but how you came to those decisions
• have a solid basis (preferably a scriptural one) for your family standards
• arbitrary rules can provoke our children to anger (Eph. 6:4) but rules based on the clear instruction of the Lord will produce God-fearing, parent-honoring children

4)  Establish a trust relationship with your children based on their love relationship with God

• our ultimate goal with our children should be to make rules obsolete, because they are completely guided by their own walk with the Lord

A Mom Just Like You

I started a review of A Mom Just Like You by homeschooling mother of ten, Vicki Farris, yesterday, but got sidetracked as I reflected on why it was such a blessing to me to read it as I was plugging along through the end of our school year in survival mode.  While I don't share her every conviction, Vicki's transparency and wealth of experience gave me the encouragement and focus to finish this school year strong.  Amazon describes the book with

Let's face it...the bulk of home schooling falls on mom's shoulders. Although very rewarding, it is not an easy task.
No one knows this better than home schooling mother of 10, Vickie Farris. Through her warm, practical style, Farris, will fill you with encouragement and practical suggestions for those days when the challenge seems overwhelming. And for those thinking of embarking on the home school adventure, she offers her insights gleaned from years of experience, giving confidence and resolve. After all, she's a mom just like you. Hey Mom...you can do it!

She had me at hello (well, okay, it was a few pages in) with her disclaimer "It's not that I'm all that patient or organized.  It's pretty much just the grace of God that gets me through" (26).  Okay, good, cuz if it requires an incredibly patient or ultra-organized mom, I give up.

I appreciated several messages she wove throughout the book.

1.  Children are a blessing and God uses them to shape us into the image of Christ.

"The reason most people do not want a lot of children is that--let's face it--children are a lot of trouble and a lot of work. . .They require us to grow up and shape up, to deny ourselves and become more like Christ if we are to have any measure of success with them.  And what a genuine blessing that is!  Children force us onto our knees, drive us to the Lord, and sharpen us for even greater service (104).

"With little ones utterly dependent on us, we have a special chance to model God's self-giving love for His children.  Remember that with greater 'freedom' comes greater temptation to live for our own pleasure.  Rather than complaining about your current situation, or envying those who do not have small children, rejoice that your life naturally compels you to the kind of service to which God calls each of us" (207).

 2.  Stop striving to be The Perfect Mom or The Perfect Homeschooling Mom.  Our hope is in God alone and as a friend said to me this weekend "________ isn't what's going to get me into heaven" (you fill in the blank with whatever it is you're trying to kill yourself to do perfectly). 

 "Curriculum and schedules are helpful tools, but they are not "miracle solutions" that will make us perfect teachers and mothers.  Our hope is in God alone" (133).

"We eat simple meals for breakfast and lunch, with most of the kids getting the food themselves.  Yes, this usually means cold cereal instead of eggs and toast, and hot pockets or macaroni and cheese more often than homemade soup and sandwiches, but I know I would go crazy if I tried to be "The Perfect Mom" in everything" (214).   (I signed her up to be my new best friend, right here!!  No condemnation from this mama in the trenches!)

3.  Examine God's purpose for you in your current stage of life and take each opportunity for service to the Lord in prayer before giving an answer.

"I want to encourage you that God gives each of us different seasons of life in which to accomplish different tasks for Him.  When you have young children, God's primary assignment for you is in the home.  When they are grown and gone, He will have other jobs for you to do.  But there are certain things we can and should do to serve others even now.  When approached with a new job or project, do we automatically take it to prayer and determine whether or not it is something God would have us do?  Or do we simply act on the spur of the moment, and under the influence of our current emotions?" (167).

4.  Develop the proper attitude toward times of refreshment as gifts from God

"When you do have a chance for a break, receive it not with a sense of guilt, nor with a sense of entitlement, but with simple gratitude to the God who cares for your every need" (216).

She also shared several encouraging passages from Scripture, stories from her experiences, and practical tips that anyone can apply to enhance their days of parenting and educating.  My favorite one that I immediately applied involved our daily Bible study.  When we lived in Missouri, we had a great daily routine in which everyone met at the table at 7 am to read the Bible with Daddy before he went to work.  Since he now has to be AT work at 7, this wonderful routine has gone to the wayside and we have had a difficult time establishing a consistent method of Bible reading with all five children together.  Vicki's suggestion is perfect for this season of our life:

"Each child has an assigned day for selecting a passage of Scripture and reading it aloud for the rest of us.  I am often blessed to hear the Bible verses that my children choose, and it sets a good tone for the entire school day" (52).

I am so thrilled to have "happened upon" this book on the shelf of my local library while helping my son find books about small-engine repair.  The Lord certainly used it for refreshment for this tired mama.

Tomorrow I plan to share Vicki's four tips for preparing our children for adulthood (since I had to return the book and won't have it as a constant resource on my bookshelf.  This way I can return to it again and again.)

Survival Mode

This has been the most difficult school year I've faced yet.  As August approached, I knew it would be a challenging year because homeschooling with a one-year-old always provides opportunities to practice patience and perseverance. (Like when you leave a pie on the table and he gets up from nap and no one realizes he is up and he eats the top off the pie.)  One-year-olds are notoriously busy, need lots of training, provide multiple distractions, get sick, and change their own schedule (going from two daily naps to one) which affects everyone else's routine.  Of course, they are also super cute, fun, learn something new every day, only stay one for one year, and teach everyone tolerance and appreciation--so it works out.


But I didn't realize what all the year would hold.

The year brought more sickness than I had ever experienced as I got hit with flu, strep throat, ear infection, canker sores, and a doozy of a cold.  It's one thing for the kiddos to get sick, but quite another for mama to take a turn.  My husband resigned from his longterm job, worked another that required him to be away from us for several weeks at a time, participated in several interviews, and accepted one job only to be offered another which finally led to us moving.  We moved in the middle of the school year--and there's no need to expand on all the time, distraction, and stress that had on our homeschool.

We left our friends and our support group, something I didn't realize how difficult it would be until we did it.  I had taken for granted having people who knew me, who "got" me, and could provide encouragement when it was needed without having to be asked.  I had taken for granted the classes the kids had and the network of friends and fellow homeschoolers we could turn to for a ride or sharing materials or even just taking an afternoon off to go to the park or get together at someone's house (believe it or not, 10-15 kids playing together for an afternoon provides mothers with a break!).

For the first time in many years, I haven't had a daily (MOTH) schedule.  I hope to never have a year without a schedule again.  Each morning we get up and have to figure out what the day will look like rather than relying on that beautiful schedule that just tells everyone what to do.  It's survival mode for sure as we plug along, repeatedly digging in boxes to find a notebook or a magnifying glass or the next classic for our literature studies.  I didn't take a break once we moved--we moved in on Saturday and dove right back into school on Monday because I didn't want to get too far behind.

In the middle of Algebra, Geometry, Biology, writing essays, reading great literary classics, etc., etc. I was searching for piano teachers, violin teachers, new homeschool groups and classes, sports opportunities and trying to unpack essentials--not to mention teaching the younger children both academic lessons and character training.

I have simply "kept on keepin' on" to get through the year, and this end of the year has been especially rough (is someone moving the finish line farther and farther away or what??).  But the last couple weeks I was blessed to come across the book A Mom Just Like You at the library (which I think they should just give to me since there are "no homeschoolers at the library" chuckle).

I meant for this post to be a review of this great book by Vicki Farris (wife of HSLDA's Mike Farris and homeschooling mother of ten), but this post has gotten awfully long as I reflected (whined?), so I will extend it tomorrow.  Suffice it to say, I found her book very uplifting and just the sweet words of encouragement I need to continue on through these last few weeks.  She knows what it's like, she's been through easier years and challenging years, and she's incredibly real and transparent.  She doesn't "kick me when I'm down", she points me up.

And that's just what I needed.

"Not by might nor by power, but by my spirit," says the Lord of hosts. (Zechariah 4:6)