How Can You Afford It?

I've received several emails asking questions about adoption so I thought it might be fun to address some of them and occasionally share some of the ways adoption continues to affect our life, even as we're not actively pursuing bringing a child home right now. As a commenter shared on Missy's post (you really must read this post--it's very inspiring) about the various stages or 'camps' we are in regarding our passion for the Lord:

I submit that there is one more camp - the one where we are living with our Passion. We adopted 6 children (one baby, then a sibling group of 5 boys) a little over 10 years ago. When we adopted, we were younger, optimistic, more naive, and had more energy. It's a calling for sure, but the struggle does not end when the Passion is fulfilled. That's actually just the beginning of a life of faithful dependence on the author of the Passion.

There is a great deal of wisdom in this commenter's post. Adoption has changed our lives forever (for the good!) and it would be naive to think it's "all over now". From interactions with birthparents to talking with our children about their stories to potential medical issues and fielding questions about our multi-shaded family, adoption will continue to impact our lives for years to come.

I think the most common question I've heard lately involves the finances of adopting. Many people seem supportive of the idea of adopting, but think there is no way they can afford it. They think those adopting must have two incomes, a fat savings account, an inheritance, and/or net $100,000 per year. I'm certainly not going to deny that it's ridiculously expensive, but I'm just going to share a little about how we have "afforded" it even though we meet none of the aforementioned criteria.

We've been blessed with the generosity of fellow Christians, as I've shared before. We were given almost $2000 to help with the costs of our second adoption, and nearly $6000 to assist in bringing Tyrell home. This has been a faith walk, for sure, as we had previously been much more comfortable as givers rather than receivers. (God is always working on that pride thing in our lives!) Seeing God move His people to support the fatherless is a beautiful and faith-building experience. Feeling His provision through His people comforts and encourages, and has reinforced our trust in Him.

Another way adoption has been made more affordable for us is through the adoption tax credit. If you are considering adoption but find the costs daunting, you should definitely look into this. We aren't big fans of 'living on credit' and prefer the 'save-then-buy' lifestyle, but we have borrowed the money to adopt each time. With the tax credit, they apply up to $13,000 you have spent on adoption expenses toward what you owe Uncle Sam. So, for example, if your owed amount is $8,000 and you've had $9,000 withheld from your income throughout the year (and trust me, you won't have any trouble exceeding the adoption expense qualification), your tax return will be $9,000 (where it would have been $1,000 without the adoption tax credit). We aren't receiving money from other tax payers, but our own taxes are being reduced. I honestly don't see how we could have afforded to adopt without this benefit as these hefty tax returns are immediately plopped on our adoption loans in addition to our monthly payments, enabling us to actually pay the loans off (and be able to adopt again! smile)

It's also been a lot about budgeting (thank you Dave Ramsey!), cutting down on the 'wants', and making some sacrifices. It's amazing how many things that used to be in the "need" column have been relegated to their proper place as 'wants'.

For example, this is a picture of my husband's and my dresser. We bought it used from his aunt about 14 or 15 years ago.
Do you know that a dresser with working drawers is really not a 'need'? Alan has repaired the drawers several times, greatly extending its life. But they are just no longer fixable, no matter how handy my hubby is.And it just doesn't matter.We still have a place to put our clothing--our "too much clothing", really, when we consider how many items we have compared to orphans in poor countries who have (at the most) two changes of clothing. We'll get a nicer dresser someday. . .but bringing our children home just takes precedence. The dresser just doesn't matter in the big picture.

Perspective is something God will change for us if we just let Him. He'll shift our paradigm to value what He values, and it's amazing how freeing that can be. If you're considering adopting but you're scared of the costs, don't let that be the factor that leaves a child fatherless. God provides through a variety of means. Those means might be tax breaks, a temporary part-time job, the generosity of others, or some other avenue. Regardless of the method He uses, it will be something that builds your faith, draws you closer to Him, and produces growth.

And that's really what this life is all about--that's what really matters.