Loving the Little Years

It really wasn't the end of the world. 

Apparently if you put a "ballerina" to bed when she's not tired yet, and she just happens to have a blue marker in her purse, she will color herself.  I think maybe she was putting on makeup.  I'm not really sure what her thought process was, but I do know she doesn't know who Smurfette is, so that wasn't her goal.

I recently finished reading Loving the Little Years:  Motherhood in the Trenches by Rachel Jankovic and I can't recommend it highly enough.  As I have been telling everyone I talk to about it, I found it refreshing, funny, encouraging, and surprisingly insightful.

The author is a mother of five children ages five and younger.  She writes with a wry sense of humor that just lets you know she really is "in the trenches" and makes her more relatable.  This book was very timely for me as I have (a mere) three children ages five and under.  It reminded me to treasure this time--to remember how quickly this season passes and not to get hung up in my own selfishness.  It was refreshing to me because it was written with such joy underlying each word.  It's the kind of book that makes me hide a smile when my child writes all over herself rather than flip out, and it's the kind of book that makes me want to go ahead and let the little ones make gingerbread men and teddy bears--not out of a motivation of guilt, but with the intention of enjoying the moments I have with them.

I enjoyed Rachel's sense of humor (I can call her by her first name because, well, that's just how she writes.  I think we might be friends now--reading her book is like chatting with a close and inspiring friend who is transparent with her struggles yet simultaneously motivates you to be the best 'you' that you can be).  In case you are intimidated by her, her "children do not sit on monogrammed picnic blankets in coordinated outfits while she brings them nutritious snacks on a silver tray" (12) and she was "much godlier sometime in junior high" when her "room was clean" and she was "reading her Bible every day and feeling really good" (13).  She also sometimes "takes the garbage out and just stands outside the back door taking some deep breaths, getting ready to go back in (when taking the garbage out becomes a "destination," you know you are really in the trenches)" (40). 

And her story of the middle-of-the night nursing of her twins, needing her husband's help, and him sleep-walking "bouncing a baby, patting it on its little air back and soothing it back to sleep" while she was paralyzed holding both babies, afraid to move for fear of waking them up and "whisper-shouting" at him "Stop it! You do not have the baby--I have the babies! Wake up! Get the babies! That is not a baby"--well, I was literally laughing out loud at the description.  See, she gets it, she really does--it's a safe place.

But then the wisdom she imparts!  Wow!  She shares great ideas about using stories to help our children understand why they shouldn't hit one another and comparing their emotions to spirited horses which are great to have but must be controlled by the rider.  "The goal is not to cripple the horse, but equip the rider.  A well-controlled passionate personality is a powerful thing" (30).  She encourages games and illustrations to help our children understand how cranky complaining looks and then contrast it with thankfulness and contentment.  She reminds us that even if we have several busy little ones, "individually they are being precious and curious and excited.  As their mother, I am responsible to see them individually, even when they are presenting themselves to me en masse" (52).

Even as she gently ushers her reader toward a joyful attitude of appreciation for our children and makes us laugh as we can so vividly relate to her examples, Rachel sprinkles tidbits of wise admonition which *this* mama, at least, needs to hear.  "As you deal with your children, deal with yourself always and first" (14).  If everyone seemed to be out of control all day long "when you come right down to it, you know exactly who needs to be spanked, and it is you.  Because if you are the teacher and none of the students are succeeding, you need to be doing a better job.  You need to think of new ways to explain the lessons" (26).  "While your children are little, cultivate an attitude of sacrifice.  Sacrifice your peace for their fun, your clean kitchen for their help cracking eggs, your quiet moment for their long retelling of a dream that a friend of theirs allegedly had.  Prioritize your children far and away above the other work you need to get done.  They are the only part of your work that really matters" (51).  "Imagine yourself as one of your children.  Try to really examine what life for them is like (68).

As I said earlier, my only complaint about this book is that it was too short--only 102 pages.  I guess I'll just have to read it again and again. . .

"Everyone to whom God has given wealth, and possessions, and the power to enjoy them, and to accept his lot and rejoice in his toil--this is the gift of God.  For he will not much remember the days of his life because God keeps him occupied with joy in his heart."  Ecclesiastes 5:19

"Motherhood is hard work. . .Accept it.  Rejoice in it.  This is your toil.  Right here.  Those are their faces.  Enjoy them. . .Look them in the eyes and give thanks" (102).

Easton lost his first tooth--precious times!