Mere Motherhood

Mere Motherhood: Morning times, nursery rhymes, and my journey toward sanctification by Cindy Rollins

I loved this book!

Oh, it wasn't amazing, I must admit. It's a memoir from Cindy's 30 years of homeschooling, not a how-to-homeschool book, so don't open it expecting that. And really, for a memoir, it's frustratingly vague. Yet I understand her desire to protect her children's identities and not "air the family's dirty laundry". It's not always a fascinating read, but it was like a warm conversation with a good friend--an encouraging breath of sweet fresh air. I've been homeschooling for 16 years, so that's long enough to read between the lines of the various trends (good and bad) in the homeschooling movement that Cindy lived through.

I wouldn't have gotten as much out of it even just five years ago. I daresay this is not the best book for a younger, newer homeschooling mama. She likely won't appreciate it as much. There are things we simply don't know that we don't know until we get there. But maybe reading it will help her connect the dots when the time comes. And I came away both encouraged and inspired.

I chuckled aloud several times as I read, especially as she gently poked fun at herself: "Each morning we sang a new hymn, verse by verse. . .I was a bit neurotic about learning all the verses. Now I know that is called self-righteousness" (46) and "Obviously we weren't in the the habit of buying horses; we just read books about horses" (50) and after having drugs the first time for her ninth and final delivery "I would never be an obnoxious mother-in-law bragging that I had ALL my babies naturally" (64). LOL I thoroughly enjoyed her voice.

I also loved the way she sprinkled Scripture throughout (in her own voice, no quotation marks) and her frequent but casual references to great stories like The Chronicles of Narnia and The Lord of the Rings. She is definitely a book-lover.

In a nutshell, Cindy's book shares three main ideas (among other smaller ones) she has learned in her homeschooling journey: 1) It's easy to let our relationships with our children become idols in our hearts. 2) Be careful not to take too much credit or too much blame for the successes and failures of your children. 3) Motherhood is a tool for our sanctification.

She shares things that worked, and things that didn't. She warns those of us in the trenches not to make mistakes she made. She transparently shares the joys and struggles of various seasons, including her current season during which she has moved and no one knows the "former her" who homeschooled nine children but now see her with only her last child almost ready to leave the nest. (wouldn't that be so weird?!)

There were so many great nuggets sprinkled throughout. I could definitely chat this one out side-by-side in a couple of red chairs! I'll try to limit myself to just a few quotes:

"Motherhood is sanctification. Perhaps way more sanctification than you ever bargained for. . .There is no trite way to explain the heart-wrenching joys and sorrows you have seen. There is no way to warn the mommy next door or your daughter-in-law. It is a walk of joy that often includes the tearing off of the old dragon skin one painful layer at a time, made all the worse because you didn't even know you were wearing dragon skin. No one ever does" (ix). 

"my lifelong pattern of hanging out with people who are smarter than me" (89). (I try to do this too!!) 

"I suppose that I should have raked in a lot of wisdom and knowledge, and yet, the further up and further in I go the less sure I am about what I know. I know a lot less today than I did thirty-five years ago. . .After all these years, I don't know as much as I thought I did, but I hope that makes what I do know more valuable" (135). 

(about reading aloud) "When we cannot escape ourselves, we can escape to other worlds together"(139). 

"It seemed that I had worked passionately for nineteen years on a beautiful product and, in the end, he had become something entirely different than I intended. I did not recognize him at all. How could I go on creating beautiful pottery pieces if they weren't going to turn out as I had intended or hoped? Until one day I had an epiphany. I was not the potter. A potter was shaping my children, but it was not me. . .My son was not my product. He was the work of a great artist: the Creator of all" (156). 

"Part of the sanctification of motherhood is learning to trust God with our children. . .Our children must not become 'Our Precious'" (161).

AND MY FAVORITE QUOTE OF THE BOOK:
"Josef Pieper tells us that leisure is the basis of culture. Most moms would laugh at the idea of leisure, but that is essentially the gift homeschooling gave us--the leisure to learn" (163).