Secret Thoughts

I'm certain this book will make my "top books read in 2013" list.  If it doesn't, then I'm in for an incredibly enriching and challenging year of reading if I'm going to read ten books even better than this one.

In The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert, Rosaria Champagne Butterfield details her "train-wreck conversion" from liberal lesbian English professor to a married homeschooling adoptive mom and christian.   

You're going to want to read it. 

Don't let my pitiful ruminations distract you from that fact.  I've devoured this book twice in the last two weeks and roped a friend into reading it and meeting at  Perkins to discuss it with me (six hours!  We spent six hours chatting our hearts out, from 6 pm to midnight!).  I would love to meet and visit with the author, even as I am secretly intimidated by her intellect.  She shares her story with honesty, talent, and grace.  She doesn't hold back anything of the questions that both provoke and plague her journey, yet is tactful, and ultimately challenges the reader to self-examination in multiple areas:

Worldview
I was fascinated by her understanding of worldview, even as the story began with her staunch belief in a secular feminist postmodern worldview heavily influenced by Freud, Marx, and Darwin.  As a professor of women's studies, she even stated on the syllabus that all papers must be written from a feminist worldview in order to receive a grade.  As the story progressed, however, she decided she had wasted her best years steeped in the wrong worldview (80) and adopted a biblical worldview as she realized that sin starts with the way you think.  I am saddened that many christians are unaware of what a worldview even is, let alone do they attribute such significance to the effect our worldview has on us while intellectuals with unbiblical worldviews are quite conscious and deliberate about shaping worldviews. 

Thinking
She really challenges christians to be thinkers--in fact she calls christians "bad thinkers."  She challenges us not to try so hard to surround ourselves with people just like us because "where everybody thinks the same, nobody thinks very much" (3).  Convicting.  I like to think and to be challenged, but I fear that I am also a "bad thinker".  And I too often seek people like myself--to cocoon myself in a safe, comfortable little bubble?

Identity Crisis
Butterfield labels her conversion as a train wreck because it upended her life as she knew it--even to her very identity.  When Christ gets ahold of us, it really should drastically change our lives as we die to the old man and rise to walk in newness of life.  Butterfield described the cost as the "you that you used to be" (41).  She pulls no punches as she scorns the distorted gospel that teaches one can say a simple little prayer and continue living as before while enjoying the entertainment-driven, club atmosphere of mega churches boasting coffee shops and bounce houses (34).

Christian walk
One of my favorite lessons I learned from her story was the contrast between praying for the willingness to obey and praying for miraculous healing "if" God really doesn't want me to live this way that I referenced after reading her article online.  She references John 7:17 as teaching that obedience comes before understanding and so she prayed for a willingness to obey even as her flesh wanted to argue and demand an explanation for why her lifestyle was wrong in God's sight.  She detailed the necessity of being a church who doesn't offer platitudes to new believers, but rather encourages them to count the cost.

I was especially struck by her decision not to attend a particular congregation because "a part of (her) didn't trust (her)self there" (73) because she needed a group that was going to hold her accountable, who was going to teach the hard stuff, who was going to embrace and pray for her.  I'm just going to say that I think that's a very difficult thing to find--a group of believers who are going to provoke you to love and good works.  I think I know exactly what she meant by not trusting herself in a certain fellowship.  We know when we're going to be challenged to grow and be uncomfortable, and we know when we're going to be allowed to sit back and be lazy.

I could go on and on about this book and the thoughts she prompted in my own heart and mind about hospitality, growing through trials, sexual sin, and adoption but this post is quite long enough.  I highly encourage you to read it (although I don't agree with everything she says and she details quite a lot of her doctrinal beliefs--read with discernment and think) and then share your own thoughts.  I'll try not to keep you up until midnight discussing it!

Mother and Daughter Retreats, Part Two

In more fun times retreating with my daughter from the daily cares of living, Briana and I met with several young ladies for a weekend of bonding and encouragement last Fall.  One of the things I liked about this gathering was the age span of the young ladies.  Most of them ranged between the ages of 15 and 25.  It was a great opportunity for them to establish some relationships across the seasons of high school, college, the workforce, and young married ladies.

There were some great times of Bible study, encouragement and discussion as well as times of games and outright silliness and giggling.

Yes, and throwing of paper balls.  Briana had a great time with new friends and friends of several years.

But I was also blessed to get to hang out with my cousin and friend, Teresa, since she hosted and her daughter was also there.  Teresa and I grew up going to church together and have experienced more than our fair share of giggles over the years.  It was also fun to get to better know our younger counterparts Alena and Ashley, standing behind us, who identified themselves with us.

 Perhaps we should try to grow up and be better examples!  :)

Happy Birthday, Dr. Seuss

I'm afraid my new friends here in Iowa think I'm a little bit crazy.  The truth is I like people, I like to have fun, and I like to be busy (just not *too* busy).

So, shortly after the children's musical was over and the Monday after the teen night, we had a birthday party for Dr. Seuss (his birthday was March 2 which was a Saturday this year and I'm not so crazy as to have the Dr. Seuss party and the sledding/game party the same day).

As much as I hated to limit the guest list, I couldn't quite imagine having 80+ children in my home, so we only invited 35 people.  This is how I throw a Dr. Seuss party, however:  I sent out an email explaining what I wanted to do and included links to a couple of great sources for Dr. Seuss activities (including Sharla's site!).  Then I suggested each mom bring either a snack, craft, or game and we pool them all together (many hands make light work, you know).

Well, I chose the right families to invite because these moms went all out!  To tell you the truth, I think I did the least of anyone--that's what you call good delegating, folks!  (grin)  We ended up with activities from five different Dr. Seuss books.

Green Eggs and Ham

For this classic (my personal favorite), one of the teen sisters read the book while the kids colored a picture and then decorated sugar cookies.  It was the cutest idea.  They made the sugar cookies in the shape of eggs and covered them with green icing.  Then they had little pink pig sprinkles (as well as many other sprinkles) for a "green eggs and ham" treat that kids will actually eat (as opposed to the food coloring in scrambled eggs with ham trick I've tried a few times).

 The Cat in the Hat

The kids had lots of fun with this book.  They started with crafts--yes, two crafts.  The first craft was making hats out of paper plates.

Then they used pipe cleaners to make the Cat, Thing 1 and Thing 2 finger puppets.  This was a huge hit and my children are still having fun playing with their puppets.

After finishing their crafts, they played "pin the hat on the cat" which produced lots of laughter.  As you can see, we split the kids into groups to travel from station to station, that's why you see smaller groups of boys and girls separated.

Finally they made and enjoyed a special treat made of Oreos, icing, and gummy Lifesavers.  Bring on the sugar!

One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish

The first activity for this book was to guess the number of fish crackers in the fishbowl, and then the children got to paint a fishbowl and glue on little fish of all the different moods and talents of the fish in the book.

 They also got to enjoy little snacks made of blue finger jello and goldfish crackers and play a fishing game.

The Lorax

The biggest hit from this book was creating these darling Lorax puppets.  My kids are still playing with these too.

They got to have a snack of marshmallows and chocolate teddy bears and played some kind of game with cotton balls and pompoms. 

 There's a Wocket in My Pocket

Another of my favorite Dr. Seuss books provided the children with the opportunity to create their own imaginary creatures. 

 It was so much fun to see what the kids came up with using feathers, pipe cleaners, pompoms, googly eyes, toilet paper rolls, craft sticks, construction paper, foam, hot glue guns. . .

 We still have creatures all over our house that my kids created.  There's a Mock on my Clock and a Zeiling on my Ceiling.

 And we mustn't forget the Belf on the Shelf.  I'm not great at decorating my own house, but the kids are doing it for me!  They also got a huge kick out of the silly game "Hickle, Pickle Humbug" in which I hid a small toy in plain sight and they had to find it and try to be the first to shout out "Hickle, Pickle Humbug" when they found it.  The first to find it, of course, got to hide it for the next round. 

This party finished up our Dr. Seuss unit in which we had tons of fun reading his books, playing rhyming games, early reading games, and other great activities.  Easton pronounced the entire effort "A BLAST!!" and he can't wait for Dr. Seuss's birthday to come around again.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter

Every once in a while I stumble across a book that is enjoyable to read, sucks me into the plot, and gives me lots to ponder.  The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards was one such book.  It simply begs to be discussed, so I'm rounding up a few fellow moms around town to read it and discuss it with me later this month, but that's a little off the subject.  (I just had to throw that in for Carrie who has called me out on my tendency to want everyone else to read what I'm reading so I can talk about it with them!)

The general plot of the book revolves around the consequences of Dr. David Henry's decision to secretly dispose of his daughter who was born with Down Sydrome while telling his wife that she had been stillborn but her twin brother was born alive and healthy.  (Don't worry, his nurse takes the little girl and disappears with her to raise her as her own.)  It's quite well-written and the growth and development of the characters makes me feel like I know them--better than they know one another, as a matter of fact.

I'm going to have so much fun discussing this book with my new friends.  I love thinking about the choices we make in our lives, the paths those choices take us on, and how our lives might have been different had we made different choices.  I think the theme of secrets and how they lead to more secrets and walls between loved ones will be interesting to delve into.  I'm sure we'll really dig into the sanctity of life and who decides what makes life worth living as the book not only addresses people with special needs but also perceived hopelessness and flirtation with ending one's own life.  The role our faith plays in our lives, the recognition of shared pain, marriage, redeeming the time, standing up for what we believe in. . .The Memory Keeper's Daughter provides opportunity to discuss all this and more.

I will note that there are some "mature" subjects in this book, but don't stop reading there--they are handled tastefully.  There is mention of extramarital indiscretions, but no details and drug experimentation, but the book exposes the vanity of these actions.  Really, even though the book is not of the "christian genre", it is one of those books that aptly illustrates the emptiness of a life lived without hope.

I'm so glad I stumbled upon this one (I got it at a library book sale for a quarter--insert happy dance).  I may have to read it again before our little group meets to discuss it. 

Briana, Friends, and Sledding

I was deluding myself in that last post.  Life doesn't really slow down.

Briana and four of her new friends at the coffee shop

Last weekend was Briana's birthday and it was a delightful and busy weekend.  She was especially touched when a few of her friends surprised her by meeting her at a little coffee shop in town to buy her a dessert and a special hot drink.  After visiting and giggling for a while, they spent the rest of the afternoon checking out the fun little shops around town.

Then that night we took her out to supper (she chose Mexican and we happened upon the best Mexican restaurant we've tried here yet) and took her shopping since she wanted a new Bible cover and cd for her birthday.

The next evening we hosted a Teen Night for the local homeschool group.  The night started with them having a blast sledding.

They tried all kinds of fun tricks like making a long train by holding one another's legs and trying to make it down the long, long hill as one unit (it worked once!) and hooking arms to sled down side by side.

They had a really great time with lots of competition, exercise, and laughter.  Then they came inside to a warm fire, hot chocolate, and some pizza burgers, chicken wings, and all sorts of snacks.  I couldn't get all of the entryway in the frame, but I captured a good part of the chaos that results when 22 teenagers come in from sledding!

The rest of the evening was spent talking, laughing, playing the piano, playing games, and just generally having a great time.

Briana and Destry have developed some good friendships with a pretty good group of kids.  It's kind of funny how things work out, isn't it?

"We Are United" Children's Musical

Life should slow down a little now that the performance of the children's musical is over.  With the incredible assistance of Briana, I directed the musical "We Are United" for about 35 children in the homeschool group, including Easton and Kiana.

All the participants jammed into one shot

Briana was much better at remembering all the words and choreography to the songs than I was and I'm not sure I could have done it without her this year.  Destry was also a great help as he played the chords on the piano for vocal warm ups, led the kids in fun rhythm exercises, handled the sound equipment, and generally served as my gopher.  Briana and Destry have been in similar musicals I've directed in the past and I love that they had yet another opportunity to learn to serve and "give back" to others.

The story of this plot was centered around a game show (rather like the Survivor series) in which contestants are on a tropical island and each are proudly certain that their talents will guarantee their win.  Pictured on the right are the game show hosts and on the left are the six contestants.

 

As the show progresses, members of the Bible council (pictured above) recite Scripture teaching that all parts of the body are needed, gifts are given for the good of the body, and the importance of being united in Jesus Christ until the contestants finally learn to join forces and successfully complete the challenges.  It's really quite a clever little show and the songs are catchy and fun.

I was really happy with the way four of the homeschooling moms came together to help with the set, costumes, and props.  I think the set turned out so amazing!  Here was the little hut for the Bible council (made from a patio umbrella and a roof thatched out of paper bags!).

 

And I've never seen cuter palm trees in my life!  But the details are what makes it, with the little monkeys and snakes and frogs and such finishing out the set.  Very talented ladies I have to work with!

Being the director, it's really hard to get pictures of my own kids.  I was too busy making a fool of myself sitting in the front row mouthing the words of the songs and miming the choreography for the youngest kiddos to think to grab my camera.  You can see them a little bit here way in the back.  Easton is over on the left side wearing his monkey outfit and Kiana is over to the right, the shortest one in the production with her bright orange skirt and pink cowboy boots.

It was a really great group of kids to work with.  Everyone is already looking forward to doing another musical next year! 

I was tickled with the group's generosity, too.  They gave me a $100 Amazon gift certificate as a thank you gift with which I have already purchased Lit:  A Christian Guide to Reading Books when it was on sale for a mere 99 cents.  I still have $99.01 to spend!

The Scarlet Letter

I'm posting my review of The Scarlet Letter that I wrote for the book club discussion over at Reading to Know so I don't lose it! :)  We're having fun discussing over there and people are sharing some great points.  Go check it out!

Nathaniel Hawthorne's classic novel, The Scarlet Letter, provided a great deal of fodder for discussion with my two teenagers recently.  We spent so much time discussing it and writing essays inspired by this book that I simply can't imagine how I'm going to condense my thoughts into a blog post for Carrie's book club.

Nevertheless, I'm going to try.  Most people likely already know the storyline of The Scarlet Letter from plowing through it in high school (like I did).  Now twenty years later my thoughts have been more piqued by Hawthorne's crafting--although I can't really say I *enjoyed* reading it much more than I did the first time.

• PRIDE:  I was struck by the pride each of the characters demonstrated, likely because of my own pride issues.  From nursing a wounded ego by a faithless wife to fearing the community opinion to proudly rejecting discipline and hating reproof the three main characters demonstrate the follies--and subsequent consequences--of pride.  I wonder what would have happened had Dimmesdale been transparent in confessing and repenting of his sin.  What would have been most helpful and edifying to the rest of the church?  It seems to me that hiding sin leads to denying sin and takes away accountability in the church.
• REBELLION, REPENTANCE, PENITENCE, and PENANCE:  I've never read a fiction novel that made me think so much about various responses to sin.  Repentance, of course, is precipitated by godly sorrow but too often I think people stop with regret or penitence rather than allowing their sorrow to lead to a change of mind and behavior.   On the other hand, the Dimmesdales of our christian culture try to pay for their sin on their own and that, my friend, is simply not possible. This was an especially beneficial discussion with my teenagers as one of them is tempted to feel a need to "pay back" for what the Lord has done on our behalf and I think reading and discussing this book opened some eyes a bit.
• EXPECTATIONS:  I couldn't help but ponder the varying expectations placed on people dependent upon their status in the community or church (clergy vs. laity distinctions).  While those in leadership positions certainly have more responsibility, I'm not sure we are right in our human tendency to put leaders on a pedestal and then apply more stringent expectations on them than ourselves.  Leaders are still humans and as such they will fall--and as such they are still recipients of the Lord's mercy and grace.  When we put them on such high pedestals I fear we are creating the same climate that led to Dimmesdale's secrecy rather than encouraging an atmosphere of confession, repentance, and forgiveness.  I could dwell on this, but I'm choosing to step off this soapbox.  (Although don't think I'm condoning the practice of sin in anyone, it just seems to me that biblical standards apply to all of us equally.  I hope that's clear.)
• SELF-JUSTIFICATION:  Was anyone else particularly pricked by Hawthorne's vivid portrayal of our inclination to continue farther from God once you have stepped onto the path away from Him?  Dimmesdale seemed willing to take the leap from a brief, impulsive affair (at least that was my interpretation) to purposefully choosing the wilder path across the ocean where they would be free to indulge their desires without any accountability.
• PURITANISM, ROMANTICISM, and TRANSCENDENTALISM:  I won't take time to go into this one here, but I truly found it fascinating the way Hawthorne personified these belief systems in Dimmesdale, Hester, and Pearl regardless of whether I agree with his portrayals.
• CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT:  Finally, I can't help but marvel at Hawthorne's talent in painting his characters.  The way he uses different perspectives (such as from the townspeople, Hester, and Pearl in particular) to flesh out the characters is almost worth reading the book yet again.  Maybe in another twenty years.

I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again.  Reading the classics challenges me so much more than reading much of the drivel written more recently.  I just love pondering these timeless issues and discussing them with fellow book-lovers.  I look forward to benefiting from thoughts others gleaned from this classic.