Children in Church

I could write about this book and its topic every day for the next week, but I'll try to spare you that.  Without going on about it too much, I have been noticing with increasing concern a tendency toward the devaluing of children in the prevailing culture.  For example, at Destry's violin recital and symphony performance, I felt people glaring at me that I should dare bring my younger children.  My mom noticed it too.  I tend to surround myself with people who love children and consider them a blessing, so I was unprepared for this attitude.

Sadly, I'm afraid this attitude is infiltrating the christian church at large.  Quite frankly, (and attempting not to be offensive at all) I was shocked some time ago to visit a church where children were strongly discouraged from being in the auditorium for the service.  If parents insisted on keeping their children with them, they were relegated to an assigned area.

 Stained glass window in a church building at a wedding we attended recently.

In my numb shock, all I could think was "What does Jesus think of this?  Didn't He say 'Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God'?  I can think of multiple Old Testament passages that specifically list children as being included in the presence of the reading of God's Word.  Why wouldn't we want children with their parents as they approach the Lord in worship and study of the Word?

Two possibilities come to my mind: 

1. The general tendency we have in our society to want entertainment.  If we see the gathering of the church body as a time to be entertained with great worship music and a dynamic message, we might not want to be distracted by the responsibilities of parenthood.  If, however, we see the gathering of the body as a time to worship, to remember the Lord's sacrifice, to build one another up, and glorify  God, we might be more likely to bring our children alongside us so they can witness our worship and learn to worship Him as well.
2. Our sad neglect of child training.  If we haven't trained our children to obey or to know when it's appropriate to sit quietly, our children will be a disruption to the body at large and they will need to be shuffled off out of the way.

When I saw Children in Church:  Nurturing Hearts of Worship by Curt and Sandra Lovelace, I couldn't wait to read it.  I was most struck by their "sense of loss at the mass exodus of the next generation immediately before the opening of the Word of God" (118) and can't help but notice how it coincides with the mass exodus of young adults from the church.  This likely correlation makes me sit up and take notice.

The Lovelaces gently explore Scriptures showing the Lord's heart for children and helping the reader understand that children both benefit from gathering with the congregation and contribute to the service.  My personal experience resonates with their statements as my children frequently whisper "we know that story/verse" when they hear the teaching and many encouraging older members have reassured me that baby sounds give them joy and hope for the future. 

I think the Lovelaces do a good job of not only addressing the principles of children in church, but also the practicalities.  They share tips (from experience) for packing activity bags, illustrating sermons, and training children to worship alongside the adults.  They address the "Philippians 2 principle" simultaneously reminding parents to train their children at home so they won't hinder the worship of fellow believers and encouraging others to be encouraging and helpful to the struggling parent rather than condemning.  They give examples of bringing an activity to share with a parent and even examples of inviting children to sit with an older, more experienced parent to support a younger parent.  This sounds like true "one another" christianity.

My slight criticism of this already short and easy-to-read book is that it might have belabored its points a little more than it needed to, but I also realize I was already convinced before I started reading so another reader might not share this criticism.  I was most blessed by the reminder to teach/lead my children to worship, not just keep them quiet so they won't disturb worshipers around us.  I have been guilty of having the wrong focus this last year and I am so thankful for their speaking the truth in love which I needed to hear.  They also ended the book with a very nicely done summary of points addressed to "church leaders".

Children in Church:  Nurturing Hearts of Worship by Curt and Sandra Lovelace encouraged me to keep on keeping on and refuse to grow weary in well-doing.  I appreciated the abundance of Scriptures cited in support of children worshiping with their parents and am motivated to bring my children alongside me in adoration of our Savior.  The Lovelaces speak with a voice of experience and authenticity liberally sprinkled with both grace and conviction as they share encouragement and practical hints for those of us still in the trenches with our children beside us in the pews.

I received a copy of this book in return for my honest review.