Well, Crystal is having her baby today, it's pretty certain. But she's still hesitant about an adoption plan, so we are sitting tight, once again (you guessed it) WAITING.
Waiting to see if she has the baby and how they are doing.
Waiting to see if she chooses to make an adoption plan.
Waiting to see if she chooses our family.
Waiting to see if she signs the papers.
Waiting to see if we need to pack, make flight arrangements, childcare arrangements, etc.
We have been planning to go to an intense Bible study next week. Will we go, or won't we? I look forward to either option, whether it involves flying to Florida to pick up my new son or if it involves a time of spiritual growth and fellowship. But I feel stuck in limbo, uncertain which outcome to plan for.
I have absolutely no idea.
But I'm praying for Crystal, that her delivery would be safe. I'm praying for the baby to be safe and healthy. I'm praying for Crystal to have discernment and peace with whatever decision she makes. Join me, hmmmm?
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
One of Many Reasons Why
Last night we had Casey's pizza and watched a movie, Invictus. We really enjoyed it, and stopped the movie at least three times to talk about points.
I lay in bed afterward thinking about Crystal's question "Why do you homeschool?" There are so many reasons we live this lifestyle, and each reason is multifaceted. I can't imagine having to write an essay on all the reasons and the layers within them. But our evening watching and discussing that movie made me reflect on just one of them.
The movie, as you may know, is about Nelson Mandela's presidency of South Africa as the apartheid ended (did you have to look that word up? We did--we stopped the movie to haul out the dictionary and look it up! I had heard it before, but didn't know exactly what it meant).
As the plot unfolded and we could see the racial tensions, Briana and Destry started talking about Prince Henry the Navigator and how he started the slave trading and the white colonization of South Africa back in the early 1400s. Then they talked about David Livingstone and how South Africa was the entry he used into the African continent to share the gospel. And when the rugby team from New Zealand did their little war dance, we had to reminisce about our studies of the Maori and how much fun we had (do you remember their Maori snowman they made?)
This is one of the reasons I homeschool. I don't have to teach to a test, I am not limited to state or (let us not go this route--but the writing is on the wall) national standards. When they study something, they don't just read a sentence in a text, memorize a date for a test, and then forget about it. We have delved into Prince Henry, David Livingstone, and the Maori people--and my children remember it. More than that, they can apply that knowledge. They connected the dots, all on their own, and saw how history from the early 1300s, 1400s and 1800s influenced our recent history of the 1990s. They saw how history affects the future; they saw that decisions made today will have consequences.
This is one of my goals and reasons for homeschooling. I want my children to love learning, to apply what they have learned, and to connect the dots between causes and effects. I want them to see the big picture, to realize this life is not about them--but that it's about living for the Lord and being aware of the influence our life can make.
Next on our agenda--read the poem Invictus and read biographies about Nelson Mandela.
I lay in bed afterward thinking about Crystal's question "Why do you homeschool?" There are so many reasons we live this lifestyle, and each reason is multifaceted. I can't imagine having to write an essay on all the reasons and the layers within them. But our evening watching and discussing that movie made me reflect on just one of them.
The movie, as you may know, is about Nelson Mandela's presidency of South Africa as the apartheid ended (did you have to look that word up? We did--we stopped the movie to haul out the dictionary and look it up! I had heard it before, but didn't know exactly what it meant).
As the plot unfolded and we could see the racial tensions, Briana and Destry started talking about Prince Henry the Navigator and how he started the slave trading and the white colonization of South Africa back in the early 1400s. Then they talked about David Livingstone and how South Africa was the entry he used into the African continent to share the gospel. And when the rugby team from New Zealand did their little war dance, we had to reminisce about our studies of the Maori and how much fun we had (do you remember their Maori snowman they made?)
This is one of the reasons I homeschool. I don't have to teach to a test, I am not limited to state or (let us not go this route--but the writing is on the wall) national standards. When they study something, they don't just read a sentence in a text, memorize a date for a test, and then forget about it. We have delved into Prince Henry, David Livingstone, and the Maori people--and my children remember it. More than that, they can apply that knowledge. They connected the dots, all on their own, and saw how history from the early 1300s, 1400s and 1800s influenced our recent history of the 1990s. They saw how history affects the future; they saw that decisions made today will have consequences.
This is one of my goals and reasons for homeschooling. I want my children to love learning, to apply what they have learned, and to connect the dots between causes and effects. I want them to see the big picture, to realize this life is not about them--but that it's about living for the Lord and being aware of the influence our life can make.
Next on our agenda--read the poem Invictus and read biographies about Nelson Mandela.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Nerve Wracking
I spent an hour on the phone today with Crystal, a birthmother who is considering our family as she makes an adoption plan for her son who is due around July 29.
She seems very nice, articulate, and organized. She had a list of questions prepared for me that made me feel as if I were being interviewed--as indeed, I suppose I was! I know it's not about me, and I shouldn't have been nervous, but I felt very nervous anyway. She definitely loves her baby and wants the very best for him and she's going to do all in her power to make sure he ends up in a safe and loving home.
Here is an example of some of the questions I remember her asking
She seems very nice, articulate, and organized. She had a list of questions prepared for me that made me feel as if I were being interviewed--as indeed, I suppose I was! I know it's not about me, and I shouldn't have been nervous, but I felt very nervous anyway. She definitely loves her baby and wants the very best for him and she's going to do all in her power to make sure he ends up in a safe and loving home.
Here is an example of some of the questions I remember her asking
- How would extended family accept a brown baby?
- How will you handle racist comments from people?
- How do you discipline your children?
- Why do you homeschool? If your children wanted to go to school, what would you do?
- What kinds of opportunities are they offered with homeschooling, and do they get to take classes and do things with other kids?
- Do you have a pond/pool? Are you CPR certified?
- If you’re home with your kids all the time, what do you do for yourself/when you need to get away?
- What is your religion?
- Why do you want another child?
- What kind of interaction do you expect during the adoption process?
All these questions, of course, are well within her right to ask as she is trying to do what is best for her son. So now we continue waiting to see if she chooses our family to parent her son. That's just the way this adoption journey is going--be prepared at all times, and then wait! I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much, but I really liked her as I visited with her, and it's exciting to think he will soon be born. Please be praying that God's will is done and for Crystal as she makes this difficult decision.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Motivation
"What motivates me?" asked the leader of a Bible study this last Sunday as we were discussing spiritual growth.
We have a responsibility as fellow believers to motivate one another, to incite one another to love and to do good. In order to effectively motivate, we must know one another well enough to know what motivates our fellow believers.
Hebrews 10:24 says "And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works" or in the NIV "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds."
The only other time this Greek word for 'provoke' or 'spur' is used in the New Testament is in Acts 15:39 where the KJV translates it as 'the contention was so sharp between them'. So, this is a really strong word--we're not just to suggest or encourage someone to do what is right--it has a stronger connotation than that.
Different personalities require different motivations. Some are inspired to do good deeds by seeing others do good deeds--while their counterparts might get lazy thinking it's already done or intimidated that others are doing it better than they could. Some are motivated by words of affirmation and/or rebuke, while others are offended or hurt by similar words.
I can't help but also think of the opposite of motivation. What discourages me? The more I think about these things, the more I think a healthy body of believers would endeavor to know both what motivates and what discourages each member in their spiritual walk and then make a point to employ the motivational techniques and avoid those that discourage as the body 'grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work' (Ephesians 4:16).
As for me, I am motivated by words of affirmation, for sure, as well as a challenge to learn and grow. I am encouraged when invited to share in something. So if you see my spiritual walk faltering, invite me to study the Bible with you or join you in serving someone, or ask me to discuss a challenging Bible question (so I will be prompted to get back in the Word like I need to be!). I am discouraged by criticism/critical spirits and similar attacks to which I react defensively rather than being prompted to love and do good works.
How about you? What can your Christian brothers and sisters do to spur you on toward love and good deeds? And what should we avoid doing that may lead you to stumble?
We have a responsibility as fellow believers to motivate one another, to incite one another to love and to do good. In order to effectively motivate, we must know one another well enough to know what motivates our fellow believers.
Hebrews 10:24 says "And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works" or in the NIV "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds."
The only other time this Greek word for 'provoke' or 'spur' is used in the New Testament is in Acts 15:39 where the KJV translates it as 'the contention was so sharp between them'. So, this is a really strong word--we're not just to suggest or encourage someone to do what is right--it has a stronger connotation than that.
Different personalities require different motivations. Some are inspired to do good deeds by seeing others do good deeds--while their counterparts might get lazy thinking it's already done or intimidated that others are doing it better than they could. Some are motivated by words of affirmation and/or rebuke, while others are offended or hurt by similar words.
I can't help but also think of the opposite of motivation. What discourages me? The more I think about these things, the more I think a healthy body of believers would endeavor to know both what motivates and what discourages each member in their spiritual walk and then make a point to employ the motivational techniques and avoid those that discourage as the body 'grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work' (Ephesians 4:16).
As for me, I am motivated by words of affirmation, for sure, as well as a challenge to learn and grow. I am encouraged when invited to share in something. So if you see my spiritual walk faltering, invite me to study the Bible with you or join you in serving someone, or ask me to discuss a challenging Bible question (so I will be prompted to get back in the Word like I need to be!). I am discouraged by criticism/critical spirits and similar attacks to which I react defensively rather than being prompted to love and do good works.
How about you? What can your Christian brothers and sisters do to spur you on toward love and good deeds? And what should we avoid doing that may lead you to stumble?
Monday, July 19, 2010
Immaturity
We've had the opportunity to be involved in some outstanding Bible studies recently that have been prompting a lot of thought and self-evaluation. One lesson was about spiritual growth, and the leader of the study mentioned, almost as an aside, that he sees three areas in which spiritual immaturity is evidenced. This was not the main point of his message, but my brain got hung up here, and I have really been meditating on some of these points.
Spiritual Immaturity is evidenced by:
Spiritual Immaturity is evidenced by:
- Carnality. I Corinthians 3:1-3 talks about infants in Christ being worldly and getting bogged down in jealousy and quarreling. In Philippians 3:15-21 Paul cautions Christians not to have confidence in the flesh, and observes that instead of being mature "their mind is on earthly things." This makes me think of so many things that tempt us to think about the flesh, to fulfill self, to focus on this life here and now. . .I even think of entertainment as someone recently said "the purpose of entertainment is to keep us from thinking about God." Now, I'm one who enjoys reading, watching movies, sports, and playing games--but when I thought about it as just distracting us from our purpose as a Christian. . .that really makes me stop and think!
- Ignorance of the Scripture. Hebrews 5:12-6:2 talks about those who need milk, not solid food, which is for the mature "who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil" and are ready to move beyond the elementary teachings about Christ. Constant use. . .I would sure know the Scriptures better if I used them constantly!
- Instability. Ephesians 4:14-15 tells us not to be children who are tossed to and fro by every wind of doctrine, but to *grow up* into Christ in all things and II John 9 cautions us not to run ahead but to continue in the teaching of Christ. It's so tempting sometimes to have 'itching ears' and seek out those teachers or books that tell us what we want to hear or have a new idea instead of loving the Truth and continuing in the teaching of Christ. I think of Balaam, famous for his talking donkey. God gave him clear direction. . .but Balaam didn't like what God said. So he asked again, like a child asking for something again, or going to the other parent, hoping for a different answer. He certainly showed immaturity, both by his carnal greed and by essentially saying "I don't like what God says--how can I find a way around it?"
Why They Need Both Mommy and Daddy
Destry has been working on farm implements with Alan quite a bit this summer. As a result, he builds replicas with his Legos. Here he made a mowing machine complete with a sickle, PTO shaft, and Pitman stick.
He showed it to me and I said "That's really cool, Destry."
Then he showed it to his dad. Alan immediately started to move it across the table while saying "ch-k, ch-k, ch-k, ch-k."
Then he had to examine it closely to figure out how all the parts worked and they played around refining some pieces.
That is just one of the many reasons God's plan is for boys to have both a mommy and a daddy. I have never in my life been tempted to pick up a Lego creation and drive it while making sounds--you know, PLAY with it.
He showed it to me and I said "That's really cool, Destry."
Then he showed it to his dad. Alan immediately started to move it across the table while saying "ch-k, ch-k, ch-k, ch-k."Then he had to examine it closely to figure out how all the parts worked and they played around refining some pieces.
That is just one of the many reasons God's plan is for boys to have both a mommy and a daddy. I have never in my life been tempted to pick up a Lego creation and drive it while making sounds--you know, PLAY with it.
Friday, July 16, 2010
Confession Time
I have three confessions to make today. They involve parenting and homeschooling. I could confess many more shortcomings, of course, but I have chosen to reveal only three of them for now.
1) I am tired of my children practicing instruments. I have not revamped our daily schedule since Briana and Destry began piano lessons, and I just can't figure out a good time of day for them to practice piano. Destry practices his violin every morning from 8 to 8:30 and that works out pretty well. But they have to take turns on the piano, and if they do it in the morning, it seems to mess the whole day up and I feel behind. The sound of wrong notes makes my ears hurt, my blood pressure rise, and simply puts me on edge and makes me irritable. Add to that, Mrs. Twila is moving them along at an incredible pace, so they each think they need to practice for an hour. Oh, and did I mention they enjoy it? So sometimes, at random points throughout the day, they practice AGAIN!!
2) I don't particularly enjoy Tolkien. I thought I did--it's been years since I read his books--and I purchased an incredible literature guide for The Lord of the Rings series. The guide is outstanding, it will teach them more than a hundred literary terms, and they will write many essays and other excellent opportunities. I was so looking forward to this literature unit and enjoying it with the children, but I'm reading The Hobbit right now and it's like taking medicine. Maybe it will get better???
3) I am tired of math. I enjoyed math in school and took every class--Algebra I and II, Geometry, Trigonometry, Analytic Geometry and Math Analysis in addition to Statistics and Calculus in college. But now I'm tired of it--and research says math is the weakest subject for homeschoolers, so I have long been determined to stay with my children in this subject. I watch every new lesson with them, look over what they are doing to make sure they understand it, and personally grade not only all their tests, but most of their daily lessons (although they sometimes switch papers and check one another). I am tired of pages piling up that need graded and I am tired of sitting down and remembering how to work with binomials, polynomials, square roots, slope-intercept, and volume and surface area.
Well, that's enough sharing for one day. Sometimes parenting and homeschooling just isn't about me and what I enjoy, now is it? And don't worry--I'm not letting my bad attitude rub off on the kiddos. They're still practicing instruments, we're still going to have fun with Tolkien, and I will continue keeping up with Algebra and Geometry (even if it kills me!). I bet that was three things you didn't know about me before, hmmm?
1) I am tired of my children practicing instruments. I have not revamped our daily schedule since Briana and Destry began piano lessons, and I just can't figure out a good time of day for them to practice piano. Destry practices his violin every morning from 8 to 8:30 and that works out pretty well. But they have to take turns on the piano, and if they do it in the morning, it seems to mess the whole day up and I feel behind. The sound of wrong notes makes my ears hurt, my blood pressure rise, and simply puts me on edge and makes me irritable. Add to that, Mrs. Twila is moving them along at an incredible pace, so they each think they need to practice for an hour. Oh, and did I mention they enjoy it? So sometimes, at random points throughout the day, they practice AGAIN!!
2) I don't particularly enjoy Tolkien. I thought I did--it's been years since I read his books--and I purchased an incredible literature guide for The Lord of the Rings series. The guide is outstanding, it will teach them more than a hundred literary terms, and they will write many essays and other excellent opportunities. I was so looking forward to this literature unit and enjoying it with the children, but I'm reading The Hobbit right now and it's like taking medicine. Maybe it will get better???
3) I am tired of math. I enjoyed math in school and took every class--Algebra I and II, Geometry, Trigonometry, Analytic Geometry and Math Analysis in addition to Statistics and Calculus in college. But now I'm tired of it--and research says math is the weakest subject for homeschoolers, so I have long been determined to stay with my children in this subject. I watch every new lesson with them, look over what they are doing to make sure they understand it, and personally grade not only all their tests, but most of their daily lessons (although they sometimes switch papers and check one another). I am tired of pages piling up that need graded and I am tired of sitting down and remembering how to work with binomials, polynomials, square roots, slope-intercept, and volume and surface area.
Well, that's enough sharing for one day. Sometimes parenting and homeschooling just isn't about me and what I enjoy, now is it? And don't worry--I'm not letting my bad attitude rub off on the kiddos. They're still practicing instruments, we're still going to have fun with Tolkien, and I will continue keeping up with Algebra and Geometry (even if it kills me!). I bet that was three things you didn't know about me before, hmmm?
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